$( '#xxx' ).tabs({
select: function(event, ui) { 
var theSelectedTab2 = ui.index;
if (theSelectedTab2  == 0) {
$('ul li.ep_s1').removeClass('ep_s1').addClass('ep_s-click1');
if ($('ul li#h13').hasClass('ep_l-click1')) {
   $('ul li#h13').removeClass('ep_l-click1').addClass('ep_l1');
}}
else if (theSelectedTab2  == 1 ) {
$('ul li.ep_l1').removeClass('ep_l1').addClass('ep_l-click1');
if ($('ul li#h12').hasClass('ep_sidebar_friends-click1')) {
   $('ul li#h12').removeClass('ep_s-click1').addClass('ep_s1');
}}
 }
}); 
if i use selected: 0 it will set up the first tab as active but it will now go through the if (theSelectedTab2  == 0) statement and go through adding those classes. 
if after the page loads i click on those tabs the script works perfect.
basically i want when the page loads the if (theSelectedTab2  == 0) statement and everything that happens inside it to be active.
thanks
Perhaps the following line, after the tabs initialize:
$( '#xxx' ).tabs('select', 0);
Hopefully, it will also trigger the event you want.
Trigger a click event on the first tab after page load?
Like $('first tab selector').click()
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